i'm anxious. ravenously anxious. being here is destroying me beyond expression. my soul is yearning so desperately for this. smothering each day that passes from my calendar with the deepest hue of red X's. it's drawing so near now, yet this last stretch seems but a reach only eternity's fingers can clasp. caring about my current obligations while still here is proving excruciatingly trying. especially when i look to the heavenly forecast my future holds (which i mean both metaphorically as well as literally speaking--see screenshot below)...need it now. need out. everything is about to morph most madly. the threads of my cocoon are unwinding and weaving with the most wonderful specimen my existence has ever witnessed. wound together, yet feeling freer than ever. i cannot even begin to touch how glorious. i'm trying my darnedest to stay attune to the present and my surroundings, but i'm helplessly afloat. my ties to this land have never proven strong, and are now weak as ever. i've mentally drifted since i was a girl. wild that that drift is now in such proximity to reality.